Show Me Your Face

Its been three days now....no... that is not right. Maybe a few weeks at this point...

I have prayed. I have cried over situations I had/have no control over. There is not an ounce more of strength in my frail body. I am here... lying prostrate on the floor. I have hid myself from everything. I have taken the pains of the world and propped them up on my shoulder. I have forgotten who I was and in turn who You are. But show me Your face.

Its one thing to share in the burdens of others, but the end goal is to let go and let God. It is not the will of the Lord for us to pretend that we are the saviours of the world. I tried to take the hurt away from the people I love the most, that their minds would be at ease and their souls could rest. But I did not turn it over to God, I simply took it, and in that caused myself the burdens of the world. And I cried up, Lord, YOU said You would not put any more on me than I can bear..... I CANT BEAR THIS. But it took so much time to realize my own sins. He did not put it on me.

I took someone else's test from them and harbored it as my own. And when I fell to my knees, there was no part of me that could understand why God was not bringing me out of it. I am No ONE'S SAVIOUR. I cannot save myself. Thanks be to God for sending His son, Jesus for that very purpose.

Forgive me Lord. I do not want to take the glory from You. I do not want my name to take the place of you. Show me to pray others out without taking what is Yours Father. Show me Your face Lord in the midst of my burdens and others that I may never forget.

I needed to retreat from the world that I would have noone to talk to but You Father, that there would be no arms to hold me but Yours Father. Hold me while I sleep, carry me when I am weak. Sit beside me Father when I pray. Stay close Lord when I walk. You and You alone are my peace, my comfort, my rock. Let me crawl into the cleft of the rock Lord you are great. Let me never forget where I was and who I was before I surrendered myself over to you. And in those times when it seems I am veering off the path of Your will.... simply show me Your face.